2005-07-10 @ 1:14 a.m. Oh where have you been, Miss Insanity?
Why, I've been right here the entire time, staring at blank pages waiting to be filled.
Oh why haven't you written, Miss Insanity?
Because I'm a fucking nutjob, and haven't a clue what or why to write.
But we've missed you, Miss Insanity!
Well I wish I could say the same, but since I'm insane, I don't miss much.
No, really, I haven't a fucking clue why I haven't written. It seems my world is being rocked up-side-down lately. A friend of mine is dead, buried her during the week. The old flame from work that I loved? Decided to tell me she loved me as well, even though it could never work. And the one I'm currently in love with? Is moving forward, to which I am very happy about (don't mistake what I say, they aren't moving forward with me, but any step forward for anyone is a good thing in my opinion).
So where does all this leave me and my mental state of mind? Clueless, as usual. Reading diaries to take my mind off of my own problems, and working around the clock listening to other peoples problems, to again, avoid my own.
It's been so long since I've been here, I've forgotten what song I have on here. I can't wait to update to see what it is.
I suppose one could say I'm currently in a state of non-existance within myself. I feel nothing, care for nothing, and am beginning to be content with that. My passion for writing has dwindled to the basic, boring words you see before you. Nothing brilliant or beautiful to see here.
At least not today.
My Past with No Future